OH MY GOSH!

I JUST DISCOVERED LAURELL K. HAMILTON’S BLOG!  OMG!  I MUST POST IT!!!!!!!!

blog.laurellkhamilton.org

 GO LOOK AT IT!  AND HER SITE! But, honestly, I recommend reading some of her books first, so you can be as excited about her blog as me.

In My So Limited Free-Time

What is it that I do in my free-time?  (As if I have any…)  Anyway.  I read, but that’s if I am at home. When I’m home, I read in every spare minute because I usually read in my room with music blaring so I can concentrate.  (Apparently, reading with music on is a really weird trait.)  But, when I’m at school I can’t concentrate, because people are talking and walking around and teachers are yelling at me to pay attention….  It isn’t that I don’t pay attention, it’s just that I know it well enough.  Like Math, that is one class that I may not do so hot in, but I do no studying, and I use it as my free period.  That’s probably really bad, but you know.  Whatever.  When I’m at school, that’s where I do most of my writing, because the atmosphere is so inspirational…unless someone is trying to see what I’m doing and then that’s really really annoying, because in all honesty, it’s really none of your business.  *smiles*  I actually draw energy from the people around me.  That sounds really weird, I know, but it’s true.  If I am by myself, the quality of my writing is minimal.  But, it I am next to something alive, my inspiration flows easier, and my mind is more open.  I don’t know why.  I mean, alive encompasses the forest, too.  Trees are alive, they just aren’t breathing.  *smiles again*  Now that I have thoroughly weirded you out, I need to go get my rest.  We have a pep rally tomorrow.

Life at the Moment

I am currently listening to “Black Cat” by Mayday Parade.  Look up the lyrics on the Lyrics page if you haven’t already, because I love that song.  Well, life at the moment…It’s okay.  I had my mental breakdown today, just like Rampage has hers.  It takes a little more for me to have a mental breakdown.  I am just so overwhelmed by school right now.  I just wish I didn’t go to school.  I know that people say it’s an opportunity that a lot of kids don’t even have, but they really aren’t missing much.  If I could go to a library and check out books on what I wanted to learn about, then, maybe I wouldn’t be so overwhelmed.  At the moment, the only two classes that I can even close to stand are film criticism and yearbook. Yearbook can be unbelievably stressful, but it all gets better.  I am actually pretty good at what we do in film criticism.  I study my notes and I apply that knowledge to the movies that I watch.  I also really like the teacher because she isnt’….I don’t really have a word for it, but she isn’t like my other teachers.  Maybe it’s because she is around my parents’ age and she kind of has their mentality about things.  I don’t know.  But I absolutely hate all of my other classes.  Even French is overwhelming sometimes and usually, I’m pretty good, since I’ve been taking French since the first grade.  (Since we were so close to Canada where we lived in Michigan, the elementary and middle schools taught French).  I just wanted to cry I had so much work to do when I got home.  I rarely have time to spend with my family, because I come home, do homework, eat, finish my homework and then go to bed.  And my mom recently got a job on the weekends, so she isn’t home until later in the day and my whole family isn’t in the house and that really bothers me.  It’s just all too overwhelming. I am the stupidest person for thinking I could handle an AP class.  I feel that I am intelligent, but when you are taking six other classes that are just as demanding, AP really isn’t a good idea.  We got a whole speech from the teacher about how we couldn’t just “skate by” because “this is a college course, and you need to take it seriously”.  I don’t care about passing the AP exam anymore.  I don’t even friggin’ care about the college credit hours.  People can preach at me about how it will count.  Right now, all I want to do is pass the freakin’ class without getting sent off to a mental institution.  That’d be great.  My neices and nephews asking, “What happened to Aunt Dragonfly?” “Oh, sweetie, high school completely broke her mind and now she sits in a white room in a straight jacket so she doesn’t try to jump out the window…” And you think I’m kidding.

I think that this society puts a lot of stock on whether or not you can get into a good college.  Yeah, that will probably make your life easier and drown you in student loans and your parents in mortgages, but hey, just as long as the best teach you right?  There are plenty of people who don’t even use their degrees and that’s a bummer because they probably put a lot of work into college…and a whole butt load of money.  What I want to do, I really don’t need a college degree, but in order for my writing to work, I need to kick my butt into gear, because I want to have at least one novel out in the publishing system at some phase (I don’t even care if I just submit it) so I have something to hope for.  The only problem with that?  I don’t have time.

Mayday Parade, baby!

I just recently discovered Mayday Parade on Purevolume.com (if you haven’t noticed, I kind of like that website). You would actually be surprised at how many artists that I find on that site. You can download a few songs as a preview. Among a few other bands, there are Farewell, Number One Gun, School Boy Humor, and Jet Lag Gemini. They are really good. I haven’t really posted on this site in a really, really long time since I got a different account. I like my other one better because I am not as restricted on that one. On the other one, I can talk about anything anytime I want, because it isn’t related to the school, I guess. I don’t know. My other account is a little more in depth. I have certain pages that will always be available because I make them that way!

Poltergeist

We are currently watching Poltergeist in Film Criticism and I don’t know what to say.  When you are surrounded with about twenty guys, you are pretty much pressured to have the same reaction.  But, my teacher told us that it was terrifying to people back in the 1980s, and I’m thinking, “It’s terrifying right now.”  And before you laugh at me, here’s why.  I have four siblings, and both of my parents (some kids have divorced parents, but I’m not one of them) and I have a really strong feeling of family.  When the kid was getting sucked into the tree and his parents are trying to save them, everyone was laughing and I was like, “Oh, my gosh, oh, my gosh.”  It scared me, because I have nightmares of my siblings being hurt, or lost, or I get lost and can’t find them.  And then, when that little girl is trying to hold onto her bed, I was about to cry it scared me.  It’s not like I’m going to have nightmares, it doesn’t scare me like most movies scare a child, but it touches some fears that I have.  That little girl in the movie is the same age as my younger sister.  And then she gets stuck in the tv and she’s so scared and she’s trying to talk to her mom.  That really scared me.  I’m just weird like that.